A vice president at a tech company based in Great Britain prevented my contract hire. Here is another job hire rejection. I'm grieving. There have been too many setbacks. There have been too many frustrations. There have been too many loses. I have been angry too many times. I'm tired being strong. I'm tired faking a smile.
I want to be alone. I'm confident the grieving time passes. There are too many depressing feelings. There are too many negative thoughts. I have done too much work with no rewards. Ironically, I have done too little work knowing my future is bleak. I'm pessimistic. It's a judgement call when I declare earning my freedom over. When am I done working?
Here is another irony. I'm the smartest, wisest, and strongest person today compared to my past. The adventures, experiences, self-teachings, mistakes I made and the lessons I learned, and observations are the reasons. Yet, I'm unemployed, I live with my parents, and I have little friends.
The pursuit of freedom is temporarily on hold. The pursuit of happiness is over for now. I'm taking a time out. The desire to learn remains. The motivation to succeed is still present. Life continues including taking care of my body and completing my responsibilities. I'm vulnerable. I'm weak. I'm human.
Time slows down when grieving.
To All Like Me
*raises a glass of wine* Cheers to all the people living a life similar to me. We are sincerely good people trying our best. No rewards. There are losers in life. Unfortunately, we are the losers. Also, I'm grieving to all the sincere good people who can't get a break. Too much bad luck. Too much bad timing. Too many missed opportunities. We shall never give up. We hope for the best.
Two Life Lessons Grieving
A common life wisdom is make lemonade when life gives you lemons. Here are two life discoveries expressed in concrete words. The first life discovery is tell a person who is a family member, a friend, a lover, a colleague, a neighbor, and/or acquaintance he or she is part of us. He or she is one of us. No matter what happens everyone is behind you. We have your back. He or she has support. There is no abandonment. We are with him or her.
The second life discovery is tell the person we have confidence good things are going to happen. We are ready to celebrate a victory.
Email: feedbackininblog@innovateinfinitely.com
1 comment:
I'm in the same situation. Cheers! I try what I can like selling stuff on Ebay to at least make enough to pay my cell phone bill every month. I also cast a wide net and try jobs that I would never have considered before, like senior care. When that didn't work I tried more. That's all we can do is just keep trying or maybe it's time to become self employed. The answer is out there.
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