The 2018 Christmas holiday is remembered in a negative way. Stress, cowardness, and eating comfort food were first time experiences. I was depressed, too. The last time I experienced Christmas depression was high school.
Stress. I understand the stress during the holidays. Personal stress staying strong. Family stress for which some family members don't get along with others. Financial stress seeing prices going up. I think about 2018 too much bad luck and too much bad timing.
I was happier being alone. I minimized human contact. I minimized family contact. I craved intelligent conversations. I craved meaningful conversations. I craved sincere human interaction.
Stress was contagious. I blogged on Sun Oct 21 titled Instant Bullets Blog Oct 21, 2018 stress is contagious the Center for Disease Control (CDC) should designated stress an infectious disease. Experiencing stress during the holidays was bad timing.
Coward. I experienced for the first time why people leave. I experienced for the first time why people run away. I experienced for the first time why people escape. I was happier being alone.
I dreamed I was at my cousin's upcoming wedding. My family and I sat at our assigned table. I excused myself. I went to the bar. I ordered a Coke. Coke?!? Then I ordered any white wine. I was a tropical depression. I didn't want to spoil people's fun. I didn't want to depress my family. I politely walked away.
Comfort Food. I experienced for the first time why people eat junk food to comfort. I experienced for the first time why people drink alcohol beverages to comfort. I included alcohol beverages in the category. Comfort food helped me forget my worries. Comfort food helped me destressed. Comfort food was my depressant. Comfort food is delicious--in an unhealthy way. Comfort food didn't solve problems for which I realized oddly.
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Sunday, January 13, 2019
2018 Christmas Holiday Firsts: Stress, Cowardness, Comfort Food
Labels:
Anti-social,
Depressed,
Dream,
Emotions,
Family,
Fear,
First For Everything,
Honesty,
Hopeless,
Human,
Lonely,
Remember,
Sad,
Sick,
Unexpected
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