An Active 2013 Beginning

January began my new year with many adventures and new experiences. Enjoy!

Groom Well Bro

A man who shaves his face or a man who trims his facial hair shows something. He takes care of himself. He cares about his appearance on the outside. He devotes time to portray himself as a person who finds time to groom himself. A person who finds time taking care of himself should be a person who cares about his well-being.

I see men with lousy beards, ugly side burns running along the bottom of his face, and half-ass shaving. Those facial hair appearances give me the impression they don't take care of themselves. They probably live in a messy residence. I highly doubt these men have respectable careers. High paying jobs require interacting with people. Nobody wants to look terrible in a business meeting.

Taking care of your face says something about who you are. Find time to groom yourself.

To What Bad Degree Are These Tiny, Minor, Small Stuff

I'm going to talk about my tiny problems, the minor inconveniences, the small bad moments for the past three weeks. These are the first time they're affecting my life since Fall 2004. My goal is find the proactive solution. How do I deal with these?

Most of these stop bugging me moments, these "are you kidding me" moments, these bad timing moments were beyond my control. They just happened. The most common moments were yellow lights at signaled intersections. I drove to an intersection. The green light turned yellow. I slowed down and stopped. These yellow lights happened two or more times per drive locally and from city to city.

Likewise in Fall 2004. I remembered the countless yellow lights driving to work and driving home. I thought the yellow lights were a message. I realized the message was slow down. I lived a fast paced life. Slow down and be patient. I slowed down and 2005 was a good year. I don't think the slow down message applies to my recent bad timing moments.

Another common moment was related to signal interactions. More pedestrians were crossing at interactions I'm waiting. I drove short distances doing errands in my neighborhood on Thur May 9. I waited for pedestrians crossing the intersections three times. If it wasn't for the pedestrians, I wait a shorter time for my green light. I drove to the gym six minutes away from my house on Tue May 7. I waited for pedestrians crossing the intersections two times.

Another group of aggravating me moments, these sigh moments, these "oh my God" moments were dropping things on the floor, knocking things off a table, and being a klutz like moments. I had these moments in the past. These were the longest time span I experience drops, falls, and slips to date.

There were many more. They included the following:

*I dropped off used motor oil at an O'Reilly auto parts store. The store turned me away because their oil tank was contaminated. The worker told me to drop off the oil at another O'Reilly.

*My car needed a car wash. My favorite Chevron car wash station had a four car wait. I went to another Chevron car wash which did a less than good clean. I couldn't wait another day because my car was dirty and I didn't have free time thereafter.

*There was the gym workout Tue night where a few people hogged the machines. I could have worked in. I wanted to go home instead.

*My alarm clock failed to wake me up. It appeared I didn't turn the alarm on.

*Unwanted phone calls. There were too many, and when they rang, I checked the caller ID because my parents were out of the house.

*Unwanted door bell rings. There were too many, and when they rang, I asked my parents if they're expecting someone to visit because most of the time they don't tell me.

*Fuel injection cleaner. I paid a higher priced gas for the second time in the last three pouring fuel injection cleaners in my fuel tank. It's advisable to pour fuel injection cleaner in a near empty gas tank before filling up the gas.

*I used the wrong credit card to pay for some items because the correct credit card I receive a bonus cash back.

*I made an Amazon purchase. It took me too much time to find an item between $4-5 for free shipping. I ended up buying a DVD. I wasted too much time.

*I watched a movie in a movie theater. There was a mentally challenged person in my movie shouting out random words. It bothered me a few times initially. I ignored him thereafter.

*I backed up my car in a parking lot. I waited for neighboring cars to back up before me three times at three different parking lots this week.

Add these little things up and it becomes a big deal.

My solutions are to grind it out. Ride it out. Let it go. Let it be. Stay strong. I realize they suck. It's life. You must learn how to deal with these with a mature attitude and, sometimes, professionally. Stay cool. Focus and remember to be a good guy. I said enough solutions. I believe I understand. I feel a little better letting it all out.

I know these bad moments I experienced many in a short time period is short-term. My life should turn around with good fortunes soon. I hope the short-term ends quickly. I want it today.

Finally, I apologize to the O'Reilly employees for my angry reaction.

At Least I Have My Brain

A common saying when a bad event happens is, "at least you have your health". I have a better saying which is, "at least you have your brain". I believe the brain reaction is stronger than health. I may have my health; however, if I lose my memories or my ability to think, my health means nothing. Somebody else must take care of me if I experience serve brain trauma.

Our brains, our memories, and our knowledge are most important in a human being. Protect and cherish your brain. We function well in society with a healthy and sharp brain. Never stop learning. Keep your brain active living life everyday with new experiences and new adventures. Your brain needs continuous stimulation with your five senses such as tasting new drinks, seeing new sights, listening to new music, smelling new spices, and touching new materials.

The next time you're in a bad situation and need a cheer up, say to yourself, "at least I have my brain". A functional brain means you can think of a solution. Use your wisdom and knowledge to solve problems. Be proactive, stay positive, and act optimistically.

The Three C's And A P: Choices, Consistency, Control, Proactive

I wrote a blog about a person's success is based on making good choices, producing consistent results, and controlling the most circumstances in his or her life on Tue Apr 2. The title of the blog was The Three C's: Choices, Consistency, Control. I want to discuss the "P" which stands for "Proactive", another key to be successful. First, here's a quick review on the three C's:

*Choices. How does a person know he or she is an adult? The answer is the person can make their own choices. Make good choices and life is good.

*Control. A person having control in his or her life demonstrates strength, intelligence, wisdom, and influence. A person can't control the weather, natural disasters, and car accidents. He or she can control how to deal with everyday life in good or bad moments.

*Consistency. Routine life is not being consistent. Living a daily life with ups and downs is not healthy. A person should be active with consistency. It's like a baseball player hitting a consistent .330 batting average in a season without slumps and brief hot streaks.

Here is proactive:

*Proactive. One of my career highlights was being a proactive research analyst. I supported the brokers working in the research department. My department was responsible for all the data, information, statistics, and marketing reports in commercial real estate. Specifically, one of my primary responsibilities was fulfilling daily requests and solving problems. I was creative, I thought ahead to provide better service, I innovated my work, and I produced excellent reports for their clients. I never criticized and complained because they were a waste of time and energy. I focused on satisfying the brokers' requests professionally. My professionalism was a positive action such that all the brokers could be comfortable coming to me for help.

The highlight above is a good example being proactive. A proactive person makes sure everyone is comfortable around him or her. The person never reacts in a negative way. He or she solves problems, takes the initiative, brainstorms for better solutions, and gets the job done. The results exceed expectations. There is stability and assurance everything is going to be good. A proactive person is an all-star.

Follow, practice, and adapt the three C's and P. I promise life is better making your own choices, being consistency at everything you do, controlling as many circumstances, and proactively solving problems and preventing future troubles.

My Thoughts On Mind, Body, Spirit

I realize the power of a person's mind, body, and spirit. These three must be in focus, in sync, and in good health. These three must be present, be at the moment, and with the person now. I have a better understanding the mind, body, and spirit are keys to a good life. They must flow in a person from head to toe and keep their five senses active, alert, and sharp.

The mind must be simulated. Do activities to keep your mind growing. Learn something new. Read a book. Solve a puzzle. Find new adventures and experience new experiences. Visit a new city to see new sights. Try a new food to experience a new taste. Use the mind or lose it.

The body must be physically moving like the wind. Do activities to keep your body active. Be physical to stay healthy. Walk, run, or bike. Work out at the gym. Combine physical activity with new adventures such as hiking, learning how to ice skate, or start indoor wall climbing. My uncle lost weight playing ping pong and found he has more energy. Stay physically active to stay in shape. A person has more energy and strength being fit. Treat the body well physically or lose stamina to enjoy life.

The spirit is the feeling of living life. The spirit says to a person, "Today is a good day so make something happen." Life is really not that bad despite the sad and depressing events on the evening news. Spirit brings optimism, something positive, and joy. There is beauty, laughter, and friendliness. The spirit is around us. We find it, create it, and spread it around other people. Otherwise, the world is gloom and doom.

We continue living life with the mind, body, and spirit. People miss out living an optimal life with only one or two. A good example is overweight people. These people may be smart and smiling; however, being overweight minimizes their physical strength and energy. These people can live better lives getting in shape, feeling much better with a sound body, and have more energy to be happier with their minds and spirits.

Make an effort for the mind, body, and spirit to be present and focused. If one or two are out of synch due to an illness, a loss, or a bad timing event, then take a deep breath, spend some time to recover, refocus, and reset. Mind, body, and spirit are important for a good and successful life. Stay active.

Top Ten Lessons My Parents Failed To Teach Me

There is a common saying to follow your parent's footsteps. Learn from their successes. Your parents are good examples how to live life. We mirror how they interact with other people, how they take care of themselves, spend time with their hobbies, follow their beliefs and thoughts, and mimic their actions and behaviors as children.

Parents are human beings. They're not perfect. We thought they were perfect seeing mom cook delicious meals and dad fixing broken toys. We thought they were the best at everything they did. Nobody could beat them. They set the standards of life.

Sometimes we learn life lessons ourselves such that our parents didn't teach us. Some of us experience new experiences in our adult lives we should have experienced in our youth. There are a few parents who successfully prepared their children for the adult world. My parents were far from perfect preparing me and my siblings. On a scale between 1 and 100, with 50 as the average, I rate my parents in the 40-60 range in parenthood.

My life changed for the better when I realized I must grow up on Sat Oct 4, 2008. I learned many life lessons since, and I'm learning much more today. My parents should have taught me these life lessons I learned myself. I forgive my parents for their shortcomings. Here are the top ten lessons my parents failed to teach me:

10. Household Chores. I remember taking the initiative to clean the house days before my childhood birthdays. My parents taught me how to clean the toilet; otherwise, I taught myself everything else. I used trial and error to use the vacuum cleaner. I read the instructions for the 409 and Windex cleaners.

Here's the most embarrassing story. I learned how to use the dishwasher when I was in college.

Teach your children household chores.

9. Never Ignore Problems. Problems never solve themselves. Problems were ignored at home. I had lots of problems when I was a child. Nobody helped me. Were my parents afraid of me? Teachers? Perhaps, I was a person ignored. That's another discussion.

I'm responsible to solve my problems as an adult. I'm strong enough to ask for help when I need it.

Solve problems before they become too big.

8. Read. My parents read very little to me when I was a child. I took the initiative to read books on my own in 1999. My interest in books strengthened when I started reading fiction books after Sat Oct 4, 2008. I read 75% fiction and 25% non-fiction today.

I had reading problems. I neither received proper educational help in my reading skills nor did my parents encourage me to read. I'm a slow reader today. This is an example of my number 9 entry "Never Ignore Problems".

Read to your children.

7. Exploring And Adventures. My parents raised me as a homeboy. I missed out sights, sounds, smells, and touch. This is also another example of my number 9 entry when I mentioned, "I'm responsible to solve my problems as an adult". I have been catching up what I missed from my childhood to my 20s after Sat Oct 4, 2008.

Here are some examples: eating new foods, sneaking candy in a movie theater, ice skating, visiting the Golden Gate Bridge, riding the San Francisco cable car, playing new board games, watching popular classic movies, hiking, drinking good root beer, visiting a foreign country, and ballroom dancing.

Encourage wonder and do new activities.

6. Basic Life Lessons. Here are the basics: responsibility, earn, commitment, honestly, politeness, respect, listen, eye contact, confidence, shaking hands, share, apologize, thank you, please, fun, compassion, care, ownership, friend, and being a good person.

5. Cooking. Cooking is a skill that demonstrates independence in an adult. I motivated myself to cook in adulthood. I demanded my mom to teach me some basics. I still have more to learn.

Teach your children to cook.

4. Be Mature, Be Professional. My parents failed to teach me to "act my age". I admit I had maturity problems when I was in my 20s. I had the intelligence of a college graduate. I had the wisdom of a junior high student.

I'm gaining adult wisdom at a fast pace. I'm catching up to what I must know in my late 30s. I want to let the world know I never stop learning because I still have much to learn, including being mature and professional at everything I do.

Tell your children what and how an adult must act, behave, and think.

3. Always Meet New People. My parents had few friends. I remember 95% of the family's social activities involved family. We spent little time with people outside the family. My family rarely invited their friends over at our house. That was a bad life observation and impression as a child. Our family had little outside friends.

Moreover, my parents didn't encourage me to make friends in school. The only friend that visited my house was the neighborhood kid.

I learned people come and go in our lives by myself. Never stop meeting new people. Always make new friends. Expand the circle of friends.

2. Don't Take Life For Granted. I took life for granted throughout most of my life. I lived life as if nothing bad happened to me. I always have good fortunes, a good job, a home, good health . . . a good life. I was wrong. My life today is not what I expected to be. I'm currently unemployed, live with my parents, searching for a job, and taking online classes.

One of my early lessons I learned after Sat Oct 4, 2008 was don't take life for granted. I'm looking forward to earn my successes, take responsibility for my actions, take care of my relationships, and learn from my mistakes. Take nothing for granted.

1. Talk With Your Children. I'm sad my parent's biggest problem is communication. They're terrible at communicating with me and my siblings, and my siblings are closer to my parents than me. They tell us information at the last minute. They never tell us any updates on a family activity. Their explanations are hard to understand. Their conversation skills are poor. My mom talks really loud.

It seems nobody taught them how to communicate properly with others. I must have learned those bad skills when I was a child. I corrected the mistakes. I'm a much better conversationalist. I enjoy talking and communicating with other people.

Communicate, socialize, and talk with your children. These actions prove you're open, approachable, and trustworthy as parents. Your children can talk about anything for guidance, help, and advice with confidence. And these actions are good practice for your children to communicate and interact with people outside their residence. Communication skills are important for good conversations and socialize with friends.

Time Out And Refocus 2

I wrote a blog about slowing down, relaxing, taking a time out, and refocusing on Fri Apr 26. The title of the blog was Time Out And Refocus. I want to discuss another reason to take a time out and refocus.

We live in the information age. We get the latest information by going to the internet. We're simulated from the media and our smart phones with 24/7 news, facts, information, networking, and entertainment. We can over-think and over-analyze with all the information we process with our brains. Over-thinking and over-analyzing can lead to mistakes, over-looking details, and bad choices.

Let's calm down. Take a time out and refocus. Take a deep breath. Spend time away from your daily routine. Reset your brain to think straight and make good choices. Concentrate on one thing at a time. Be steady. We haste, we waste.