Monday, June 02, 2014

There Are Many Children With Parents Like Mine

All children can generalize their own parents to compare and contrast with other parents. Most parents do a good job raising their children. No parents are perfect. There are some parents who raise their children such that they're close to 100% perfect. It's unfortunate some children have terrible parents. I wish new parents sign a contract dedicating their life to raise their children and take required basic parenting classes. I believe the world is a better place with better parents raising brighter and happier children.

No parents are unique. I realize some other parents share my parents' weaknesses. I share them today. Maybe you parents share the same weaknesses as mine. It's not your fault. You're not alone. We have something in common.

Inattentiveness. I fail to understand parents not sensing trouble with their children. My childhood had problems including depression, loneliness, and bad grades. I was bullied in grade school. I unknowingly acted weird among my classmates. My problems were obvious. I showed them, acted them, and communicated them. My parents never showed me how to be social with other children. My parents did very little to help me solve my problems.

Watch the movie Welcome To The Dollhouse. The main character's parents portray inattentive parents.

Lack Of Knowledge And Experience. My parents were 25 years old when I was born. Is 25 years old too young? In comparison, 17 years old is too young. Is 17 and 25 years old both too young ages to raise children? The short answer is 17 is too young obviously.

My parents lacked parental knowledge and life experience to raise me when I was a child. For instance, I drank a cup of milk for breakfast when I attended kindergarten. No bowl of cereal. No bread. No fruit. I can write another blog sharing my parent's lack of parental knowledge during my childhood years.

I consider myself behind in life experience for my age. My parents never shared their life experiences when they were children and young adults. I believe dinner table conversations were quiet because my parents had little to share.

Teach Me Wrong And Don't Teach Me Right. My parents were bad teachers which coincides with the above having lack of knowledge and experience. I had trouble understanding their explanations. I believe my parents rarely taught me because they know they couldn't teach. The taught me the wrong way when they did teach me.

Ignore Problems Hoping They Go Away. My parents were lucky. Most of my problems went away including depression and bad grades. I was lucky, too. I realized what I missed from my childhood to my 20s. And I mentioned earlier I'm behind in life experience for my age. I'm catching up the lost life experiences by finding time to experience them and learning what I should have learned in my younger years.

I believe my parents had confidence that my problems in my childhood went away such that they raised me as if I was Steve Jobs. Ignore my childhood problems and they go away in time. The ignoring didn't work all the time. For example, I had reading comprehension problems. I took special reading classes in 2nd grade, 4th grade, and 6th grade. I'm a slow reader today. I wished my parents were more involved in my reading problems. I believe my childhood reading problems were not solved.

Parents Little Involvement. I mentioned my slow reading ability above. I remember many days of my childhood I was lonely or with my brother and/or sister. The only parental involvement I remember was my mom took my brother and I to the library. I can't remember any moments with my dad and myself. I can't remember any moments I was with my parents--just the three of us.

Two of my dad's hobbies were photography and woodworking. I took those classes at school. My dad helped me a few times with the two classes. He wasn't fully involved. Ironically, if my dad was more involved, he probably taught me wrong.


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