Sunday, June 07, 2009

A Distraction To Crush The Anchor

Since Wed Jun 3 I'm experiencing an attitude and a feeling that's making me feel unproductive. There's something on my back slowing me down. It's like an anchor dragging me, and I don't know where the anchor is. It's like I'm riding a boat and I'm dragging something that's slowing me down. I look under water and don't know what's dragging me.

I have plenty of activities such that being bored is impossible. What am I doing? Here's the latest:

*Searching for a job. I'm still unemployed.
*Learning ballroom dancing. I practice one or two times a week. I get lessons at De Anza and from my sister. I know four beginning dances: foxtrot, waltz, cha-cha-cha, and tango. I have the desire to learn more dances and move up to intermediate.
*Working out. I'm taking a weight lifting class at De Anza. I know two beginning weight lifting workouts. I haven't done a cardio workout that I miss. I wanted to do a cardio workout on Fri. I didn't =(
*Sewing. I started learning sewing by sewing baby clothes. I finished sewing a pair of pants for my nephew. I'm sewing another pair using the same pattern. I'm learning by repetition.
*Anime. I'm watching Fullmetal Alchemist 2, K-On, Bleach, and 07-Ghost. I'm reading Bleach, Fullmetal Alchemist, Tsubasa Chronicles, Black Cat, and D.Gray Man. I'm researching two new costumes that are Allen Walker from D.Gray Man and Train from Black Cat.
*Books. I have no new books. Waiting for a Borders 40% off coupon $-) I'm rereading Seinlanguage by Jerry Seinfeld. My brother and sister gave me the book for Xmas a long time ago.
*Anime Expo'09. I'm preparing my trip to Anime Expo. I made the choice to attend just after Fanime'09.
*The others activities. Currently, I'm finishing Star Trek III. I watched bits and pieces. I'm watching Star Trek I-V from a VHS set my sister in-law gave my Dad. I'm watching the NBA Finals Los Angels and Orlando. I'm writing Blogs, check emails, and update my Facebook. I started hiking. I hike once a month. I like to hike more. And I'm working on editing the Fanime '09 costume pics.

It's not that I'm bored, not that I'm lazy, not that I'm lonely, not that I'm depressed. (Well, maybe I am depressed and it’s the accutane. Who knows? I'm not suicidal.) It's just that I feel behind, I feel I'm underutilizing my time, I feel I need to know and to do something now. I feel impatient. My sleep schedule is messed up. I slept at 1am or 2am and I wake up at 9am. Lately, I sleep at 1am or 2am and I wake up at 10am or 11am. Not good. And I got neck soreness such that it's hard to turn my face that happened on Thur Jun 4. It's time for a time out!!!

Today and possibility Mon and Tue, I continue to distract myself. I distract myself to remove and to crush the anchor somewhere on my back. The distraction began on Sat hanging out with my friends and watching movies and drinking chocolate milk for the first time since . . . gee, I don't think I ever drank chocolate milk before ~~ Some distracted activities are updating my expense database, changing the sheets on my bed, cleanup my desk, and play classic arcade games. Updating my blogs are the exception ;) I do anything to distract myself feeling unproductive and slowing me down.

There are better days ahead XD

Side note: The blog entry was posted without proofreading and editing. I choose to keep the blog entry as is directly from my mind as I typed.

I'm growing up Finding Raymond Mar

No comments: