Blogger's Note: Throwback blogs are blogs from my past. I start posting past blogs reflecting what I wrote. It's like my "A Second Look" blogs for which I give myself feedback.
Today's throwback blog is titled Third Blog Entry: Breaking Rule Number written on Jan 7, 2006. The third blog out of three blogs on the day talked about my second job after I graduated from San Jose State University. My job sucked. I started searching for a job in Jan 2007. I couldn't explain the logic for the one year delay. The company went downhill at the end of 2006. My life was great outside the workplace which made me forget my job.
I choose the criticisms I respond decades later. Today's blog is another example time heals all wounds. Wisdom is acquired as we get older. Lessons are learned. No mistakes are repeated. I connect the dots backwards.
*Like many jobs that suck, my job sucks. What makes my job suck? I work in the Research Department. The department has two workers: me and my co-worker. The department supports 70+ brokers in the local office . . . The office I worked was an outlier. A typical commercial real estate company has an ample support staff to help the brokers. Most of the 70+ brokers were self-sufficient for which they required minimal support staff. Most of the 70+ brokers were trained beyond commercial real estate and salesperson skills. Moreover, I wrote the rant in a Jan month. Jan was the busiest month in a calendar year because of the previous year's annual report and annual conference the Research Dept. was involved. Otherwise, the Feb-Dec months were normal with the exception of the quarterly reports which took significantly less time compared with the annual report.
*My co-worker is an idiot. Should have been fired a long time ago. Somehow, when he fucks up, he gets away with it. Nothing lasts forever. My co-worker was never going to be fired. One reason was two people worked in the Research Dept. supporting 70+ brokers. Another reason was the managing partner and my co-worker had a close relationship. For instance, my co-worker worked on Sat. The managing partner emailed my co-worker for research statistics on Sat. My co-worker completed the request hours later.
My co-worker's fuck up was discovered on Jul 2007. He was transferred to another brokerage house instead of being fired. I don't know why he wasn't fired. I don't know how the two brokerage houses negotiated the transfer. I should have said "never say never" instead of "Nothing lasts forever."
*Also, the managing partner in charge of the office is not a managing partner; rather a major pain. The guy has shit in his brains. The answer was simple. The managing partner ran the office by the sales numbers. His job security was strong as long as the sales numbers were good. Winning disguised problems.
*My feelings are I'm lonely. When I started the company, there was nobody to be my mentor. Heck, I never had a mentor in my life. There was nobody to show me around. The lonely feeling was incorrect. I realized years later the brokers got my back. If I spoke up, then management responded because of the brokers. Management couldn't fire me. Also, one magical day I spoke up at a workplace outing. The Administration Dept and the Graphics Dept talked to me. There was a new permanent connection.
No mentor in my life was true. 95% of all my problems I solved myself by learning from my mistakes, acquiring wisdom at the right place at the right time, and growing up. I'm lucky my life today is my best life. I'm the strongest, smartest, wisest, and healthiest ever. Ironically, I'm George Costanza being unemployed and living with my parents.
*Problem number two is I trust nobody. Nobody has proven to me, nobody has earned my trust, nobody earned the right to know me, to listen to me sincerity. Nobody has my credibility if anyone wants to give me advice. As far as I'm concern, anyone who tells me anything is full of crap. Why should I believe you? Who are you? I don't know who the people are and people don't know who I am, and even if I tell them who I am, they probably don't give a shit. Been there, done that. I was full of shit. Don't waste time figuring out what I said. It was a cry for help. If I said the shit today, then I need professional help. I'm not the shit person today.
*When I go to work, the real me doesn't enter the building ;__; It's a stranger even I'm not comfortable being. Outside work, I'm very cheerful and always busy doing stuff like reading books, playing video games, watching anime, listening to CDs, going to the gym, cooking, researching stocks, and just being myself. That's the real me. I was not the real me inside work and outside work. It was true I was busy outside work doing the stuff above. I was not cheerful outside work.
Life advice and professional workplace advice. If you're not you going to work, then changes are warranted. Everybody is human. Nobody can tolerate being a different person in a workplace indefinitely. I'm not thinking what my life is today if I continued working at the company today.
*Side note: there were four people I don't respect specifically. Two of them are no longer in my office. Another workplace advice I should have learned years ago. Anytime a group of people resign in a short time period is a sign there's something happening to the company or to the department in a negative way. I was one of four people who found better jobs in the company in early 2007. Retail is the exception because the retail industry always has high turnover by nature.
In Dale Carnegie's book How To Win Friends and Influence People, rule number one is Don't Criticize, Condemn, or Complain. The third blog entry, however, I'm going to break the rule and rant. Rant, complain, let my stress out, let my anger out. It doesn't matter to me. I need to vent frustration regardless whether the reader thinks I'm complaining or not complaining. More important, the following is going to be unedited; in other words, [sic] or verbatim.
Like many jobs that suck, my job sucks. What makes my job suck? I work in the Research Department. The department has two workers: me and my co-worker. The department supports 70+ brokers in the local office and 10+ brokers in a satellite office north. 80+ brokers. Two people in the department. Hello, senior management. The department needs additional help. No need to research the facts. Furthermore, I'm not going to be working in the company forever.
My co-worker is an idiot. Should have been fired a long time ago. Somehow, when he fucks up, he gets away with it. Nothing lasts forever. One day you are going to mess up big and you are going to be fucked!!! What has he done and got away with? Start the list:
*In 1997, the server crashed and he didn't back up the research data.
*In 2002, he calculated absorption wrong for 12 years. I found the error in five minutes 0:-) Any national real estate firm needing a researcher with new ideas? I'm available for hire >.<
*I taught him how to calculate weighted averages. He never knew what a weighted average; moreover, he never calculated rents. Come on, researchers must know basic math.
*He is still using an 80s system to calculate statistics in the 21st century. One step further, he's an obsolete 80s robot because he acts like a robot.
*He makes careless mistakes, and it's getting worst.Lesson: if it acts like a duck, walks like a duck, talks like a duck, thinks like a duck, it's probably a duck {:V
Also, the managing partner in charge of the office is not a managing partner; rather a major pain. The guy has shit in his brains. I have been working in the company for seven years. Man, that's too long to work there. I can't think of one incident where he has taken an active role in, well, anything. Come to think of it, he's done nothing to the company to make it a better place to work. Nothing. Zip. Zilch. Jack shit. The chances of him leaving the company are next to nothing because the position requires a brokers or sales license to sign off completed deals.
As for me, personally, what are my feelings? My feelings are I'm lonely. When I started the company, there was nobody to be my mentor. Heck, I never had a mentor in my life. There was nobody to show me around. I learned almost everything about the company myself (which was really nothing to learn come to think of it). I can't trust anyone because nobody in the company earned my respect, my trust, my credibility. Respect, trust, and credibility must be earned whether he or she is the janitor, engineer, director, or senior vice president; likewise for parents . . . if you want sons and daughters to learn, to love, to be good sons and daughters, you must earn their trust, their love, and their bond; otherwise, they are not going to believe what you say to them. Perhaps, that's one reason why runaway kids leave their parents. Trust, love, bond, etc. are not automatic just because Mom and Dad are parents. All must be earned and demonstrated sincerely and without deception. The same goes with co-workers, management, and executives. Earn them (respect, trust, credibility, sincerity) or lose them (co-workers).
It's out in the air. I'm lonely. I should tell somebody. Problem number two is I trust nobody. Nobody has proven to me, nobody has earned my trust, nobody earned the right to know me, to listen to me sincerity. Nobody has my credibility if anyone wants to give me advice. As far as I'm concern, anyone who tells me anything is full of crap. Why should I believe you? Who are you? I don't know who the people are and people don't know who I am, and even if I tell them who I am, they probably don't give a shit. Been there, done that.
When I started in 1999, the research department was pathetic. Terrible. An embarrassment. In one year, I provide new reports, accepted new responsibilities, increase turn-over rate to less than one business day for most requests, new ideas, etc. I proved that I can do a whole shit load for the company. What has the company proved to me? Nothing. It's the same company since 1999. No improvements, nothing new, nothing the latest and greatest (except computers of course), no innovating. Heck, my company doesn't have a CEO and a CFO. The CEO fucked up and the CFO resigned.
When I go to work, the real me doesn't enter the building ;__; It's a stranger even I'm not comfortable being. Outside work, I'm very cheerful and always busy doing stuff like reading books, playing video games, watching anime, listening to CDs, going to the gym, cooking, researching stocks, and just being myself. That's the real me. The guy who never stop innovating and wants to meet more people XD
I feel much better now and I'm going to get a good night's sleep (-,-)
Side note: there were four people I don't respect specifically. Two of them are no longer in my office. The first person was eliminated in August 2002. Officially, the position was eliminated. Unofficially, she was laid-off. The second person was transferred to the corporate office in January 2006. Her replacement started in January 2006. We shall see how the replacement does, and I'm going to have high expectations because she was promoted in my office.
Side note 2: there are a selected few co-workers I'm comfortable in a conversation; however, it's as far as the communication goes--casual conversation.